The F word

I'm a bit of a passive online dater.

I sign in every few days to vet my PoF inbox. I go through the messages and cull the fat…my standards are somewhat tyrannical. If the salutation includes a 'sweetie',' hunny', 'babe' they are cut without remorse. Any sign of moving emoticons or 'gifts' such as virtual roses, CUT! As mentioned previous, if the message does not include a reference to my profile…strike, but in that case if the guy is cute I will forgive this transgression.

If their message passes all tests…and doesn't give the sense of desperation or over-confidence I will look at his profile. Now, looking at a profile is a wee bit dangerous because they can see who has creeped them out…and yes, that has led to dejected messages in my inbox when I don't contact them upon peeking at their info.

So if the message and profile leave me thinking "why not?", I will send them a cute but short message including my msn address, so we can chat further without the tackiness of the PoF interface. One piece of advice that I have been given was to not chat too much online…after screening out total weirdos set up a face-to-face right away. You don't want to have too firm of an online rapport…a person can rely too heavily on emoticons.

That being said, I did not waste any time with my first 3-D suitor. He messaged me moments after creating his profile on Sunday. We ended up having drinks on Thursday night.

The meeting itself was good, especially for my first experience. We had lots in common. He's from Ottawa, I lived there. He works in TV, I like TV. He's the youngest of 3, me too!

He was not afraid to tackle subjects like religion, politics and exes. I yadda yadda'd religion by speaking to my love of jew culture. I gave a hold no bars stance on Canadian politics…meh. And completely avoided past relationships, even changing the subject when he brought up his. Too much too soon, my friend.

Friend. Yes, that's how I felt about this guy. Really nice, pretty smart, no edge. No spark. I'd love to get together for drinks again, but totally as friends. I got the sense he's that guy. Sounds like he may have quite a few platonic girlfriends…it didn't turn me off, I simply knew why.